I'm on a roll.
The bud
stands for all things,
even for those things that don’t flower,
for everything flowers, from within,
of self-blessing;
though sometimes it is necessary
to reattach a thing to its loveliness,
to put a hand on its brow
of the flower
and retell it in words and in touch
it is lovely
until it flowers again from within, of self blessing.
-Galway Kinnell ‘’saint francis and the sow’ from the book ‘Grace Eventually’ by Anne Lamott
I read this on the way home, way up in the sky, flying back to Sacramento. Having spent the past 12-days surrounded by what I can best explain as love, and in that, I have said it all.
I kicked it off with a 1-night stop to see a dear friend in Houston TX, we caught up over delicious Mexican food, and margaritas that had both jalapenos and blueberries in them…I’m still not quite sure how that works out, but it does. We stayed up past our bed-time, talking on the couch: me, her, her sweet wonderful husband, and rescue dog, we remembered stories that felt good to remember. We spoke them outloud, and used our hands at the really exciting parts. We laughed over new things that one day we will retell again, in the way that good friends do. The next morning we woke up, and sat around a square table drinking mugs of coffee, a cool-little spot with brick walls and lots of light. The kind of place you sit and stay awhile with friends, lovers, or with the newspaper. Soon, I was off to the airport.
On the plane, I sat next to a beautiful girl, and I knew right away that we would be friends. I knew this mostly because within 5 seconds of sitting down, she said something hilarious, and whenever that happens, I take note, hilarious people get me every time. After about 3 minutes of talking we uncovered that we share a mutual friend who we are both crazy about. They knew each other from Ohio where they went to the same college, and I knew her from living in our hometown, Rochester NY. Our minds were officially blown, and we immediately sent Jackie a picture. We did impersonations of what Jackie would say when she received this picture, and we were absolutely correct. After showing each other pictures of our dogs for the next 20 minutes, and then getting into real talk life conversations where we talked about everything from first cars that fell apart at stop lights, to our love of travel, I knew I had made a friend for life… It was instant like that. We parted ways at the airport, she on a very Mexican vacation with her boyfriend, and boyfriends family…and me…to a 8-day yoga training.
I’ve been to Tulum now 5-times, and it is one of my favorite spots on the earth. It’s rustic and blue. Simple and decadent.
Here’s what I know, spending 8-days among 75 human beings deep in the work of their leadership, authenticity and listening is a beautiful and necessary process to be a part of. It has filled me up and left me feeling deep gratitude for this path I am on. For all the wild twists and turns, for all the weather, for dirt, and earth, and sun, and for all the beautiful friends I have gathered along the way who show me love so that I may know too. Oh this beautiful life, I bow.
One of the most amazing parts of this trip was spending all those days in a row with my dear friend Cyndi. She owns breathe back in Rochester NY, where I first began taking and teaching yoga, I am certain that I would not be who I am today without breathe, and without her. It was at breathe where I began to heal a life that felt so dark and permanent. Over the 6-years of us, our relationship has evolved and taken on many forms. I arrived one day early so we could catch up, and for 12-hours we talked non-stop. Our relationship is magic, and its built on a mutual commitment for the other to grow.
My dinner date, Cyndi.
I am grateful and inspired by the work of the Baptiste Yoga Institute, and very proud to be a part of such an amazing community of teachers who far beyond that role…are leaders. Leaders I am so inspired by.
One of my biggest takeways from this training is leadership is causing something to happen, that was not going to happen on it’s own. And that absolutely everything, without exception is built on our interactions with everyone…everyone. Now that’s a legacy right there friends…and that’s what it’s all about.
Training ended, and there were a handful of us that stayed through the day on Saturday. What a perfect way to end a week like that. In the sun, in the ocean, among friends.
But oh wait, it actually gets even better than that, with a whirlwind pitstop in LA, which I don’t even quite know how to describe. I turned my phone on when I landed to this text ‘meet us here, we’re going ice-skating.’
I came rolling up to the rink with my suitcase and backpack, and nothing quite beats a welcome on skates, really, you should try it. I was immediately given ginourmous hugs and warm smiles, and directed to the bleachers where I was further given the gift of whiskey which inspired a grand finale of the flying V (mighty ducks any one?) which of course ended up in a mid-rink crash.
Being surrounded by people who you love and inspire you in a way that you could never explain, is the best way to be in the world.
That night I got to snuggle this bulldog. Rosy. Until she left to go snuggle with her Mom and Dad.
In the morning, we woke up, and we went here. And oh, the views.
3-friends, 2-dogs, and 1-amazing hike.
Yesterday, I came back to work, I couldn’t make it 2-feet without another giant hug, a welcome home, a we missed you, a I-cant-wait-to-hear-about-your-training in a way that I know is genuine and real. My team. I came home to a team that loves me and I who I love back.
Today, I met a co-worker for coffee and a meeting a few doors down from where I teach yoga at yoga shala. One of the owners, Tyler, must have had the same idea. When he left he tapped me on the back, I was right by the door, I looked out the window and there he was just smiling back. And then he did the sweetest thing, he touched his heart. Just smiled at me, and touched his heart, and mouthed the words 'welcome home' the sweetness of that moment moved me.
I came home.
The poem I read on the way home pretty much sums this whole thing up…that sometimes we have to be reattach to our loveliness. To be retold in words and in touch…
Sometimes we just need to be reminded. To bloom.